concrete as my friend

You know like how sometimes you're just so overwhelmed by your problems,
and it seems like nobody gets you.
You end up wanting to be alone,
to not have to go through the stupid pains of explaining everything,
not have to go through the stupid pains of answering questions.
Yet when you're alone,
you're suddenly scared.
You could do with an assuring grip around those nervous, shaky hands.

2 highlights, the good and the bad.



First was that my special occassion speech was a success (: I din forget my lines, I made cexi shy X100000, i got the class laughing, i was surprisingly bold and ms hernie said it was a good job.
Was quite a waste i din do it with steve.
Would have had the maximised levels of corniness.



" Baby you are like the sugar and i'm like the donut.
we were meant to be ,
and without you life would be a lot less sweeter"



wellll, yeah. that was my extremely corny concluding line. I could feel cexi literally cringing in his seat even though he was like 2m away from me.
He was meant to be my groom.
So yes, i was a bride giving a speech dedicated to my groom.



Animal cruelty, Self-Injury or Eating disorders.
I cant decide.
All are so close to my heart and i feel very strongly for all.




Second.



Session at NYP. I thought them the 6 forms of YAMEDE.
i like YAMENAI :D
and shingshing taught us HAIYAKU and SUGOII.



everything was fine until i fell asleep and woke up.
And every thing came back.
When i'm fine, i'm fine.
But one small thing could just spark the whole controversial psychological cycle playing about in my mind.
pardon my sudden maximised vulgarity.
it get's quite tiring after a while,
Playing pretend.

wished you were there

I was walking home and I saw these people sitting on the bench. I felt terribly upset watching on as this old women sat on the other end of the bench from the couple, alone and nearly falling off. I felt her loneliness and the tention that existed in the space between them. This photograph basically points out that sometimes we can be the most alone in this world when we are surrounded by others...



-Naksatra, Deviantart.





Makes me think of A Cinderella Story
" You could be surrounded by a sea of people and still feel all alone."




Basically right now, i am quite screwed. There's no way they can alter my attendance.
because what i got was a TIME SHEET. A FUCKING TIMESHEET.
And that just doesnt warrant as an mc. Seriously as much as i would love to just cuss and blame the doctor,the only one at fault is me. So many maybes and regrets of what nots but i shant start, what's done cant be undone.



The only way now, is for me to be a complete Saint during Mgen so that Dr David Hu would be able to help me appeal at the end of the semester.
Timely wake up call, i guess this is it.
I got to stop screwing up my life.



As such as i am tempted to wallow in self-pity and sorrow, even if i were to drown in all my fucking insecurities and issues, everything still goes on. And i'll be the only one hanging off the thread like a loser.




Today was another rollercoaster ride.




After speaking to paul cheong and stuff with the malay aunty at the counter quite insistently shooting me down, i went to look for Dr David Hu.
He was really nice and all and i sincerely don intend to let him down so after this i'm gonna go complete my mgen tutorials.
Right the moment i turned away from him, i was just so overwhelmed that i started to tear.
Took my phone, dialed those numbers....



And I just stared at the screen.
From a stare to a glaze with countless thoughts just darting about in my head.
Suddenly those numbers seemed less familiar.
Suddenly they seemed so much more foreign.
And i just flipped by phone shut.
Took in a deep breath concocted with a sigh.
And at that moment, i got overcome by a second strong urge to tear.



Just nice, cummz called and i cheered up over icekachang with zsa, jeremy and cummz.




Who's to know that the one thing i thought would really cheer me up and allow me to lose myself in, double-dealed me. Double the pain, more like it.
I couldn't feel the music at all.
For once, i felt true revulsion watching myself dance.
When were my lines that weird?
Since when have i looked so awkward?
But i still tried again and again.
Freestyling, even basic bounce, and i gave up in the end.
Fucking useless.



The same numbers again,
Then the thoughts just flooded me, and very dejectedly, the numbers were wiped off the screen.






もっと私はそれについて考える。
私が、私合わない多くがあなたとあるために感じれば。
私は愛する方法を決して知らない
私の危険とので ,
私は決して自分自身を愛する方法を知らない。

Today, in your embrace, the tears just came.

Today, like the showers of rain,
my tears just came... when you hugged me.
Sometimes, i feel so helpless whenever i speak- the words, they just come out wrong.
They come out incoherent to the tunings in my heart.
They fail to reflect what's truely deep down.
And that pains me, because i cant get you to understand.
Which leaves both of us helpless, helpless souls.
but when you hugged me, everything din't matter.
It was just you and me in that very moment.
Just me knowing that in all the mess, i could still have that embrace.
Overwhelmed, you rendered me speechless.




I havent danced for quite a while, 5 days is quite a while. I guess I'm still in slight post trauma mode after the AGM performance. And all i can say is that there's an insane lot i need to do and that i really love xuehui's lines.




Been a mildly tiring day, nothing particularly exhuasting but i've just been feeling really lethargic of late. I think it's the fat, pok ): . But as always the mood went for a lil rollercoaster ride. As always i go on hibernation mode whenever this happens. As always, i attempt to address whatever shit is bothering me. As always, it's a touch-and-go affair. And as always, i waste my time.



So many things on my mind now.
The biggest issue is my attendance now.
If i fuck up this chance, i'm screwed really bad.
I cant and i will not allow my entire grades to be turned topsy turvy just because the polyclinic doctor issued me a "time sheet" instead of a "mc".
I guess to those around me, those in my class, i'm that girl who doesnt seem to care much about my grades, the girl who's always late, the girl interested in everything else but her studies.
The girl who seems to talk, but no action is done.


Well, i guess they're right.


And i do have priority issues, i do have motivation issues, i do have damning self esteem issues and i do have the issue of taking a long time to pick myself up after i fall.
But it's always better late than never right?
Hopefully i can right this wrong.




Today's the first time, i suddenly felt the internet of was truely such a godsend.
Because today i read meaningful webpages, more than just the usual fashionblogs, friend blogs, selling sites and all.
I read stuff that actually meant something so much more than the usual transient stuff.
Days with my father.
I cried reading this and i think anyone, who chances upon this post should read this.
Doesn take long, has great photos, has great meaning and a reminder that all things would one day come to an end.

Oh the fxcking irony

Because everytime it hurts,
You draw back a little.
So that you'd never feel the same pain again.

Sidewalk Kiss

Slowing down to a kiss on the sidewalks.
And blurring out the faces of everyone else.
Just you and me.





Today, I REACHED SCHOOL EARLY FOR THE MEETING!
mwahahahhaa. But everyone else was late, but doesnt matter, i was early!!! :D
I think everyone else was shocked and all i could say to them was,
" If i'm not early, i'm gonna be late!"
SIGH.
*puffs out air of exasperation*
I've actually set my handphone, ipod,watch to different timings.
And all faster, it's kinda working at the moment, like i still get bouts of panic shocks when i see the time. that's good.



Been slowly sliding downwards, so i gotta pick myself up.
It's pretty tough trying to psyche myself up to be optimistic when i'm naturally pessimisstic.
*puffs out air again*



Had fun during the meeting especially when the Aunty told us the ghost stories in her flamboyant actions/sound effects, peppered with her malay punctuating the english sentences.
I LOVE GHOST STORIESSSS!!!
Albeit the fact that i will end up scary myself, but i'm always so interested!
For the next week days, i believe if i hear weird sucking noises in the toilet,
my IMMEDIATE INSTINCT IS TO FLEE.



Then i went stock hunting, and bumped into chantelle, which was pretty cool. I dunno, i've never ever bumped into any other friends who have blogshops when i go stock hunting. And i can say, yongkeong is the most willing stock-hunting boyfriend i've seen haha!
I like going stock hunting actually, especially when there's no insane throng of girls flocking about.
I like to be able to just spend some time, chit chatting with the Shopkeepers and just trying on clothing without queueing up for the changing room and all. hate crowds much.
NOW IS MONEY EARNING/ MONEY SAVING TIME.
I feel scared looking at my bank account!
I have so many plans and it's far from being able to fund me through all those.




baby was supposed to pick me up (perks of having a car) , but there was a jam so i met him at mrt station instead.
Which is still damn convenient because i can just leave my stuff in the car and not have to bother going home first.
Tmr is bye-bye picanto ._.



Second most interesting part of the day apart from stock taking was...
MEETING PRISCILLA!!!!
hahahhahahha.
she waved pretty madly infront of me,
and both of us were semi-shocked, semi-speechless.
and she went
" SINCE WHEN DID YOU GET ATTACHED? I'VE BEEN MISSING OUT ON ALOT AH"
which i found very funny.
Okay, not so funny when you're not there.
I miss 20th century fashion with pris! it was alot of fun (:





ANNNNNNNNNNNNNND........










DOES ANYONE WANT THIS JACKET?
Am selling it at Kadanata but it's all sold ):
Trying to get a backorder going because i think it's too rad to not share something like this.
But i need many many orders, so i'm trying.....
email me at kadavalentine@hotmail.com
eh heh. friends get discounts :D wheeeeee.



Details all on
KADANATA





Alot of things to attend to tmr.
we'll see how the morning goes!

Tug that Heartstring

Tripping and tripping.
Tug that heartstring and put a plug to the leaking happiness.
Need a hug, want a hug, want you .




Wore my leather jacket out, days of black are here again.
Feeling fat/ am fat/ getting fatter, opens up the huge closet and racks brain.
Nope, fat, nope , fat, nope , fat.




Studied a bit of mgen,
accidentally locked cummz out of the house for three hours ): ,
ryan exclaimed " that's a first" when i said i was going to study ): ):,
fpath, aimm, stress,
baby fetched me, no pikin car.
met gilbert and his wife and his family, my love for babies only extends to his.
WENT TO PAWFRENZZZZZZ.
*hugz baby* thank you.
Baby sucks when it comes to animals.
JACK JACK + JEANIE RECOGNISED ME *double whoop*,
oreo is that bit more affectionate.
many many dogs at pawfrenz.
no longer scared of lucas hahahhahaa.



fetched zhilin,
fetched yesen,
went to eat dian xiao er.
food= dope.
further certified that baby sucks when it comes to animals.
saw the guinea pigs.
want baby to perm hair like that one guinea pig.



went for fish spa/ massage.
HAD A DAMN GOOD TIME.
baby=ccboy scared of fish heh heh heh heh.
back home,
back to stress,
photos next time.



need to stop digging out emotions and worries midway, then sholving them back to the far depths of my brain.
PFFFT.

i cant believe, i'm actually EAGERLY waiting for CKF's call ._.
seriously, I DON WANT TO FAIL APEL AND HAVE TO RETAKE IT NEXT TIME. TAMADE.




* note to self: no more frozen curry from the fridge as dinner :x*

This is when every single realisation sinks in,
of how fucking small i truely am.
Awry, everything gone awry.

THE BIG GROOVE WAS DOPE.




And thank you so much to briyanni and nana for queueing up so early (:
we got atas 3rd row from the front seats!!
I could see the faces of all the performers clearly, this i like. SHOHEI!!!!!
But shohei was kinda off, definitely not his best.
But he is still dance god in my eyes :D tho i must say yokoi is not very far behind.



STARSTRUCK.
It's the *gasp* oh.my.god kinda a lil cant breathe feeling.
I honestly feel kinda silly?
But yea, i get starstruck seeing all the dope dancers on stage.




Missed agm training today, screw my phoneline.
I'm always missing messages here and there and i hate it, because i can just imagine being the other person who sent out the sms and din get a reply/ din get the message across.
Seriously cant wait for my plan to end then i can happily change to something else.
I will train extra hard tmr! Must.not.screw.up.my.own.item.



That aside, i'm really looking forward to the upcoming performances :D
Even though my life now is teetering on the verge of mild hysteria,i think i should be able to handle a lil more.
I think.
Progress has been okay, been trying to do accordingly even though i get distracted here and there.
I always need small reminders here and there, and today was a classic example.
Nana unknowingly became my reminder,
" You like can already what, why care..... "



Being true to myself.
I sidetrack from this alot.




I'm the first person to test out zambut's driving! (:
It's nice having your own transport i guess, but i kinda like seating in the backseat with ZO more.
I usually just space out when seating in front and that's what happened, and the distance...





this coming week shall get better?
with all the main dance events punctuating my schedule all gone.
damn it.
I WANT IT BAD.

I dont need to steal kisses

Stress stress stress. Not just agm, but everything else piling up.
Suddenly i find myself frantically trying to squeeze in this and that and this and that into my mental planner.
Sometimes i just think " one life to live, i don't want to waste my life bumming around"
sometimes it's " one life to live, phug it, no point getting so uptight ".
mental battle, no?



But i'm excited though. Definitely excited when the image of everything falling into place comes to mind, but the possible downsides....? nada. zone in on zero hype.





For now, i'm choosing to squeeze an insane lot into my plate, quite possibly driving myself up the wall... but i feel reckless. i feel the need grab hold of everything and just force myself. Push to the limits and if i fail... lesson learnt right?
sooooooooo.....
if i complain like a whiny bratty child, just give me the evil eye.
because i kind of asked for it.




gah. so this is my attempt at trying to be the superwoman i once was long long ago.
i hope i dont fall too badly.
I hope my little flicker of passion is enough to get me through (:





accent accent accent.
* drools from mouth while thinking*
How to add in that , that ... thing.
That right accent, that right control.
more so, how do i teach the rest to get it?
I just end up failing pretty god damn badly, still, i will keep trying.





all my random thoughts aside...
heh heh heh. my AA stuff arrived :D
and if i had money, m) phosis will be raided by me.
AND...
i want to pick up crocheting again.
HAHA bet none of you ever knew i knew how to crochet, in p4 that is ._.
or knitting, or very hopefully dressmaking ( but it is madly expensive).
sigggh.
Money does make the world go round.






okay back to wrecking my brains over what to do.
finally, most of it all off my chest.

Father's day with totoro

Totoro, picked by me for ahkong. Love that highly moronic chincilla face :3
and grandpa loved it too,soooo.... awesome (:






My grandpa is just too cute for words.




The day started at noon, headed over to All Saint's, checked grandpa out and off to Changi airport (:
Just a digression, but like Changi Airport is 3rd because our toilets arent clean enough._.
I don't know man, because from my memory, the toilets were so spanking clean, i could just roll around on the floor. Damn, the other 2 countries must have had gleaming, sanitised every-hour floors.
Those poor cleaners, i can just imagine some supervisor manically watching over them in absolute OCD fashion ):






Kor kor and ah kong when we just arrived.
And we headed to crystal jade, not much of a food critic but i don like crystal jade much.
The last time i went to the one at bugis, i remembered literally eating only one plate of veggies -___- because everything else was prawn prawn prawn prawn prawn.










mak mak! quite possibly the best godma in the world (: It's interesting mummy and her are sisters who look so alike yet so different.







still on the way to crystal jade...
and i wore my harem pants again today! i'm in love with them (: hope hoon's having fun with her piece too.
Tried on a tube with this monochrome checkered scarf first but mummy was like.. too much skin for the occasion. Next time!
That's baby's leopard print scarf :D and i need a haircut soon. My Pom hair is growing shapeless ( I know it doesn look like it has much shape/supposed to have shape but it does!!! ), and now it kinda looks like normal long hair. Gah. cookie cutter. Gah. The one up is i can tie my hair normally now, no more weird bunches of stray hair popping out everywhere.
We'll see, i'm starting to like my updo's alot.




haha and i know gladiators are sooo not in trend now.
That's exactly why i'm finally wearing them :D







Mummy and ahkong and my signature nail colour :D :D
The colour is so..... me.
( though not a very exact shade shown)
Plus exclusive, since specially concocted so..... muahahahahha.
Having silver nails and gold toes(accident) now, definitely a whole lot more fussfree.








To T3, and check out the scratches on my back.
Mak grabbed me when she almost fell when the skytrain jerked.
Neh.. it was the kind of burning searing pain but i din say anything.
Din know it was that bad until mak mak saw it and was like
" WHAT HAPPENED O.O "
i felt damn bad telling her that she scratched me. And in a bid to try and make her feel better, i almost blurted out something like " aiya, never mind, i'm okay with scars."
Mums would have killed me, so *phew*.
Lucky i dint!














Took many full family photos at that jungle looking area.
Went around minibits and helen, so tempted to buy so much stuff. But got turned off by the prices. I'm currently in saving mode :D And i CAN save pretty well if i want to. Haven't done my accounts ( Note: extremely basic, noob kind ) in a loong time. So i guess my bank's balance is what shocked me into saving. I'm fairly alright (: Money's slowly climbing back in.
Just that more than half of it is in cash.
And i hate banking in money. This sounds damn stupid, but i'm like that because i keep thinking about WHAT IF I LOSE THE MONEY ALONG THE WAY?!
soooo, yep.



Then it was secret recipe!!
The lobster bisque is ....... eeeyer.
But the marble cheesecake is good :D






Then it was ntuc , bought korkor's luggage ( lucky slut's going to taiwan ._. )and back home.



OH OH OH and at crystal jade we saw this damn Taiwan Triad Mafia Boss looking guy.
Swear! even his family fits that, mafia family look ( even the ahma ).
I just kept looking ( as discreetly as possible ), because it was so damn awesome.
Should stop people watching so much.



Kor Kor
" All you need now is heels and you'll look like a mafia taitai ( aisey, my honour :D ).
Wait wait, hold the luggage, HAHAH YOU LOOK LIKE A FREAKING TOURIST! "









That ends my father's day :D



Missed agm run and training yesterday to pray to papa.
15 years is a long time, So hard to imagine 15 years just flew by like that.
15 years ago, funeral, heartache, small girl, pity, tears...
It all seems to far away.
Yet i can still remember everything so clearly.



The same routine for the past 15 years,
and just like for every other thing, this year seems to be a year of realisation.
This time, i just kept thinking.
From the snaking of the incense smoke, to the amazing spread this year, to the heat from the flames, to the jokes and prayers to the pink roses.
Inexplicable, but i just felt something.



Happy fathers' day (: wish you were here.





Then it was the battle at night!
Fun Fun Fun. i wish we could session more, i love that feeling of just going with the flow.
And i learnt a bit more that night (:
Even though i took the last 2 battles because it was kinda no choice, i'm glad i din go out at the start.
Because i hate not being able to feel the music.
Can definitely do better the next time :D
I can't wait for the team to just grow together, winning/getting through or not, i just want to learn with them (:
*nana+ briyanni, jia you (: *




School in a few more hours time, like always, i'm not looking forward to it.
welllll, i packed my room though!
Half actually.
Because i only did like 3/4 of my wardrobe.
But oh well, helluva huge achievement because i never knew i had THAT many clothes.
Makes me happy, having them.
I know it seems kinda superficial, but don judge (:
You have your own trigger happy pills, i have mine.
And now, i'm even happier seeing everything so nicely packed!!!! Like i'll open the wardrobe to just look at my clothes nicely folded/ hung ( the jacket cupboard is visual orgasm! ),and feel happy! :D :D :D :D
Much more to conquer, maintain audrey, maintaaaaain.





I just realised, something.
Okay not just, but the thought kinda finally manisfested itself into something more solid(?).
Yea, sort of.
Like people who read my blog would actually learn more about me than they ever would in real life.
It's funny, how i open up to this cyber space more as compared to people.
Guess all these stemmed from my concern on the social awkwardness?
Can't quite put a finger to it.
Someone once told me i seemed to have an alter ego.
Maybe it'll seem fake to some,
but i beg to differ.
I don't think there's a oh this is the real me side to things.
Both me here, and me when you talk to me.
I'm the same person.
All those traits, all me.
Genuine.
It's just an extension of my personality and which side i choose to reveal.
And it's also how i'm better with words than speech.
I fumble, trip over my words, grapple with my thoughts when i try to relay my feelings and intentions into speech.
But in words, it's just type type type/write write write,
and everything just... flows.
Fits into place.
Matches my sentiments.
Zero frustration at expression. And i like that (:




Time to go pack my stuff, pack some mails,
it's a long day ahead later.



Been trying, been failing, but i have to.
Have to stop putting myself down so much and to just start believing.
thanks briyanni :D
good luck, health, virility ( keep it with you alright? )

See the horsies

HORSE PRACTICAL!!



Was 2 weeks ago...? To be honest, i wasnt exactly looking forward to it after hearing Doctor Rosni's case of broken ligaments. And that stayed in my mind everytime i thought of horse pract, guess it's good? cos i was extra careful.



The heat that day was horribly unbearable and being in dance gear isnt exactly the best thing to wear ... But yea, it was hella fun :D



And i never knew horses were THAT huge. The last horse, is Happy, used to be a racing horse. HE.IS.HUGE. Like just standing on all 4's he was like 1.9m? And is 5ookgO.O. I was damn scared at first, it's like any movement that he makes is HUGEEEE and like a small lil rub from him feels like a gigantic push (as told by cummz who got pushed . i mean. it's cummz. if he says the horse is strong, the horse IS strong ) I din even dare to get into the stable with him to put on the halter cos i kept thinking of Dr Rosni and her broken to many pieces knee. That was a mindf. Plus animals can feel when you're nervous. So i guess, play it safe.



Happy was like mr-popular. But my favourite was Midnight, whose still a stallion so he still has nuts. A lil grouchy, a lil unfriendly, very much not a people person. But i LOVED him. There's just something about me and underdogs. I'm just attracted to them.I guess i'm weird that way.




School starting is like 4 days. So not looking forward to it.
sigh, yet to pack my room still.
All my thoughts of mad sessioning and outings all goneee.
Gah i wanna meet jade. i miss her a hell lot.
I think i'm just getting more and more socially awkward each day.
When exactly was the last time i had that exact same feeling of talking to jade?
A long time ago.
Maybe, just maybe, it's not me. But what are the odds right?
I wanna go flea-ing/thrifting with jadey, that would be rad.




New York New York.
*sits in a corner and pouts*
WHY DON'T I HAVE INSPIRATION!!!!!!!!
everything just doesnt fit right enough for me, i hate that feeling.
i am so talentless at choreographing.
And those jibes.
welllll, a BIG F YOU TO YOUR FACE :)
even tho i'll never say that in real life because i am really, just a closet rebel ( aka ball-less)



On a lighter note, I love nana's twinkle little star choreo :D
The feel is *dope dope*.
And the bonding at each session and after.. :)




First modern class today after so long, it was a nice feeling.
I just kept pushing myself to stay focused because knowing my infamous housefly attention, i would just mess up everything otherwise.
And i could feel it (: i wanna keep improving.
There's just so so so so much more for me to work on.




Suntec training yesterday, i love my team (: at least i can be myself. i like that.





5am. yet to sleep.
back to editing photos.
and suckszzz to photobucket, bandwidth exceeded, i had to transfer the photos to a new account and edit kadanata entries.
tired.

We Closed That Gap.

Photos are from 11 june (:



a day of early morning calls, classroom romance, dance, dance meetings, gift buying for everyone, failed lingerie shopping, and, lastly, words on bread *beams*.



Went to pasir ris cc to "attend" zambut ong's class, i dont know how you'll survive army baby hahaha. Had lunch together and he got chatted up by an ah ma... why are there so many aunty killers around me?



Yupp, his class. With small kids. I was damn shy, awkward, gawky... to meet them. I dunno, maybe it's the fact that i don't interact with children much? I mean, i can mother a kitten perfectly fine, like seriously. But put a baby infront of me and i'll think " damn cute!", smile at the baby.... and i draw the line there. I'll find myself inching away from him bit by bit, like, what am i supposed to do ?! ): even zambut ong is like 10 times better at mothering and playing around with his students more than i can ever imagine myself to be.



class was, sweet. i liked stretching alot :3. It was sudden, so sudden. But it was really, sweet. I can't believe i was prepping myself up the whole time and when you caught me when i was the most off guard (:The kids were cute, like really cute, i liked them but i still felt awkward. Left halfway, zambut got teased to death by the 3 cuties with them hugging him at the end of lesson and going " teacher i love you!!!!! ". I don remember anyone around me being like that when i was that age man ._.



agm discussion. My bounce choreo, Is less than half done. And i'm stuck, nothing seems to be good enough to fill in all those small gaps. And i'm afraid as hell about teaching those doing the choreo. Sigh, those who really know me will know how much i'm afraid of taking charge, how much i'm afraid of correcting someone. This is gonna be a huge hurdle...And i'm worrying about a more than a ton of other stuff.... ):



After that was a failed session of lingerie shopping at Cotton on Body. Then i went crazy at action city. Buying the bread, buying soft toys for the people in my family ( which i have yet to give them -___- ) , then heading up to daiso to find the perfect packaging and spamming on more stuff to give.



andddddddd... prepping up my little gift-cum-proposal. Luckily i had my ipod, otherwise i cant imagine sitting at one corner in PS and doing all that. Guess the words are kinda, bad english lian. But all chinese would have killed me with all the squeezing of the stupid "icing pens" so i had to make do with half half. OKAY ZAMBUT ONG. you one time i one time. WE'RE EVEN :P pffffft.




i've watched 3 movies on 3 days back to back. Ghost of girlfriends past was hilarious and so sweet, i love romantic comedies. Then there was DRAG ME TO HELL WHICH IS HANDS DOWN THE SCARIEST ENGLISH HORROR FILM I'VE WATCHED ! sorry for scaring you baby, but it makes the movie scarier don you think!



i mean i fell asleep during english shutter and felt more sad than scared watching english the eye, so what gives? This could tie with 4BIA. seriously. AND TODAY WAS MONSTERS vs ALIENS. I love insectosaurus. not so much after he transformed into a butterfly though. First time watching 3D and i got a headache.




i signed up for Singtel's broadband mobile thingy! It's even faster than the net at my house and i can bring it everywhere. I'm excited man. i can't wait for it to get activated :D So lucky bro saw the ad, 50%. like whoooaaaa, that's a huge difference.


i hate that my room is so messy and i dunno where to start.
so many things on my mind right now, so many things to commit to. it's driving me that teensy weensy bit up the wall. cheebong.

Updates at the shop :D

KADANATA updated! (:
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I AM IN LOVE WITH MY HAREEM PANTS WHEEEEEEEEE.

THE EXAMS ARE O.V.E.R!




So here i am , sort of done with the new blogskin. Alot more stuff added to it. My archive's probably the most significant one? Like it's stuff since sec1. SEC ONE WHEN I WAS THIRTEEN AND TWITTY. i tried reading the first few MONTHS of post, to like, you know, jolt back some fond memories, but it is too excruciating. It's like do i laugh or cry at all these?



Seriously. What the hell was i thinking. It's like i totally degraded my english. but oh wells, almost everyone had a twitty side. EVEN NANA has lor, just that he deleted his old blog. so yeaaa, go ahead and laugh. JUST DON MAKE THOSE JIBES AT ME INFORNT OF ME. I will get emo, thanks.



But yea, past all that embarrassment i definite dug out alot of stuff (:
like those traces of falling in and out of like, funkamania the year Da street soulz won ( gin was BFD and now she's my instructor ), performing at Gems 2006 sweat it out (and now here i am with Gems 2009 Fairy our tale ), syfs, talentine, barefooters, empathians,obs,reggae open....
and the great load of melancholy.




and so there was nightcycling to marina barrage which was sooooooooooooooooooo awesome. but tiring. I've never cycled so far before, the furthest i ever went was esplanade in sec 4 (: but the routes were the same and i was left hanging onto those memories as i passed those areas. but the view made up for every bit of the pain in my ass :D pictures once i kop from everyone else. haha. thank god my butt ache only lasted through that night.




and right after cycling, where do i go????
SENTOSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
awesome.
i applaud myself.
It's more that 48 hours without sleep, considering how i lasted till like 10 :D
(and omg. it's 8am. i lasted through another night. my poor body clock)



i guess i've been out of the sun for waaaaaaaay too long. just a while and i was whining, fervently trying to walk into shades (HAHHA SO LOSER), in short just desperately trying my best to keep out of the sun. i've become a guniang._.



and i have very very very few pics and none of myself ):
that is just for the very very sheer reason that i don have the habit of camwhoring,
and i haven exactly digested my camera manual so i suck at the functions and end up taking ugly photos which i dont like):
time to love my camera more.



UNDERWATER WORLDDDD!!!!!!!!
awesome i finally get to go, i finally get to goooooooooooo!
i've been waiting for so damn long!
now zsa no longer has to tell me to stick my head into a puddle with goggles ._.



warning. lousy photography ):



i wanted to be that guy in the tank once.




stingrays, baby and an aunty he was trying to charm.
I FREAKING LOVE THE COW NOSED STINGRAY.
THEY ARE THE MOST ADORABLEST STINGRAYS EVER!!!
they have that cow nosed thing going on and they are M.A.N.J.A.
how awesome?
god damnnit damn freaking awesome!
like they loooooove being touched.
and they don't look horribly scary like the rest.




garden worms? cuteshit.

hugeass fishes. arapaima or something they can grow up to 3 m. O.O
whyyyy do i take ugly photos??!!!!



sotong, nellitus something.












jellyfish (: they move so slowly and the light makes them grow so many different colours.
it's like visual orgasm waiting to happen when they change colours.
i always love the jellyfish display, feels hynoptic.










cafe del mar (:
I AM IN LOVE WITH THAT PLACE.
if i was rich like rich rich. i'd book that place for my 21st to host a party.
which i forsee isnt going to happen at all.
and i'd change the music it's house, but i rather have reggae.
then there'll be more than just head bobbing and... whatever they do to dance.
it was a nice feeling, a simple nice feeling to just be in the waters and having it move up against me. it's been such a long time.
and someone was popping and intended to battle me 5 eights. HAHA.




AND MY FIRST TIME ON THE LUGE RIDE.
which i have secured my place as EPIC NOOB OF THE YEAR.
because,
I.FLEW.OUT.OF.MY.LUGE.RIDE.
blame my poor reaction time and baby still told me
" you're the first person i know who actually fell out of the luge ride"
haha okay, just quoting him quoting someone else
" It's better to be extreme than to be somewhere in the middle"
.........
need to go school to hand up my stuff. shall continue later!